Reunions

This article was written by Jenn Vesperman. Used with permission.

I avoided my high school reunion.

I don’t like social occasions much anyway. I hate getting tired so quickly, I hate having to avoid smoke. I hate all the ‘good advice’ about CFS, if I explain why. I hate the weird looks if I don’t.

But that’s not why I avoided my high school reunion.

From time to time I meet someone who I knew years ago, but still while I was sick. The response seems to be ‘oh, are you still sick?’ followed by ‘so what have you been doing?’

I’ve been being sick, dammit.

I hate that.

But these people knew me when I was well.

I just don’t think I could possibly cope with being sick in their presence. I don’t think I could cope with knowing what they’ve been doing. Seeing the doctors, the lawyers, the people who’ve got kids. The ones who’ve divorced. The ones who’ve remarried.

Seeing people with lives.

I think it’d kill me.